For several days now I have thought about a new blog post...and then sit down to do it and nothing comes out. Nothing ever seems worthy of blogging about. I am struggling. I'm not good at waiting. I have good days and bad days. Or maybe I should say good times and bad times. But, that's how it is with anything that you're waiting for. I've been trying to get things done. Clothes are washed and put away. The nursery is coming along. I go up there a lot...and just look around. Sometimes I move something to a different shelf. Sometimes I refold the clothes. The other day, I went in and sat down in the glider and cried. There is a longing for my baby that is hard to describe. Rudy followed me up there and wanted to sit on my lap. So I rocked the dog...longing for the day I can rock my baby boy.
I'm no stranger to waiting and longing. This time last year we were closing in on a year long deployment. There were days that I just wanted to throw a fit. I was tired of sleeping alone. I was tired and being in a quiet house all by myself. Tired of eating cereal for dinner. Tired of hearing civilian friends complain that their husband was gone for 2 days. Tired of talking to my husband through a computer. But, low and behold, the day finally came. He was home! In my arms! Eating dinner with me! Going to sleep with me! Talking to me face to face!
So now, as I stare at pictures of sweet Levi...I am reminded that this too shall pass.
I'm no stranger to waiting and longing. This time last year we were closing in on a year long deployment. There were days that I just wanted to throw a fit. I was tired of sleeping alone. I was tired and being in a quiet house all by myself. Tired of eating cereal for dinner. Tired of hearing civilian friends complain that their husband was gone for 2 days. Tired of talking to my husband through a computer. But, low and behold, the day finally came. He was home! In my arms! Eating dinner with me! Going to sleep with me! Talking to me face to face!
So now, as I stare at pictures of sweet Levi...I am reminded that this too shall pass.
girl, i feel ya! i have also had many good cries in the rocking chair in greer's room. this process is just hard. a sweet friend and fellow waiting momma sent me some encouraging verses today. here's one that really spoke to me:
ReplyDelete"All discipline for the moment seems not to be joyful, but sorrowful; yet to those who have been trained by it, afterwards it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness." -Hebrews 12:11
be encouraged! the finish line is near :)
I feel for you my sweet friend. I do KNOW the longing, the waiting the questions of when? Please know that you are not alone. Hold tight to Jesus. He never fails. Much love and many prayers.
ReplyDeleteAwww! Waiting for a husband to return is one thing....waiting for a child to come home is another. But he is YOURS (and Jason's hehe)! And he will be home soon! Wish i could give you a hug, friend! xoxo!
ReplyDeleteThis time next year you'll look back at this waiting time and see that time passes so quickly. Levi will be thriving and growing so fast and you'll want for time to slow down so you don't miss one single moment of this miracle...the one you're chasing around the house or playing peek-a-boo with because life just can't get any better than that full heart you have! We're all waiting with much anticipation to meet the other guy who stole part of your heart from Jason!!! Oh great, now I've got big ole Sissy tears!!!
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